Audition

The verdict: When Harry met Sally and Hallucinated and Sally went Bananas and Tried to Kill Harry

The craziness: Piano wire, nightmarish hallucinations, dismemberment, decapitation, needles where they shouldn't be and a dead puppy.

The rating: 5/10

Folks, I have to say, this box of Asian DVDs is suddenly throwing out some pretty extreme stuff, and there's only one man to blame: Takashi Miike. I had previously said Ichi the Killer was now the second most extreme movie of my brief viewing career. Well, I spoke to soon, because Audition is a new entry in my all-time-crazy-extreme top five, and it's also directed by Mr. Miike. All I can say is, his parents must be proud.

This dark, nightmarish tale of two perspectives is like a David Lynch-inspired bad trip. There are similar themes in here to Ichi, with childhood traumas triggering violent adult behaviour, and pain being inflicted in copious amounts, but 'Audition' is a very different prospect to the comic-book style ultra-violence of Ichi.

For the first hour, things move along at a pace so pedestrian, you wonder why it's considered a horror movie in the first place. Aoyama's (Ryo Ishibashi) wife has passed away seven years ago, and a passing remark from his teenage son prompts the lonely old middle-aged codger to get back on the wagon and start dating again.

When Aoyama discusses this prospect with a movie producer friend Yoshikawa (Jun Kunimura) the buddy thinks it would be a good idea to advertise a non-existent female role in a movie, and use the audition to choose a girl for Aoyama to go out with...

So, this is not a decision loaded with moral fibre, but if it means he doesn't have to go speed-dating or a traffic light ball then it's a winner, right? Well, Takashi Miike doesn't make things quite so clear cut.

When Aoyama sees Asami's application for the part, he instantly falls for her, and even though the letter accompanying her picture makes her sound like a dangerous serial killer, and her references don't check out, he decides to date her. You sense that things might not go well for this guy, and, well, not to spoil things at all, you'd be right. As I mentioned, for the first hour, the proceedings plod along, until the couple decide to go away for a weekend, and suddenly it's 'Twin Peaks', drunk and in a contrary mood.

I have just watched Audition, and have not yet slept, but I will bet money that the final scenes are going to give me nightmares. Quentin Tarantino caused a global scandal by not even showing an ear getting chopped in a torture scene, and then we have this. Let's just say these scenes are in the same ballpark, but if you thought Reservoir Dogs was shocking, then Audition definitely won't be for you.

So the violence will probably shock most, but the hallucinatory dream sequences leave us in some doubt as to whether Aoyama's actions were as pure as we were lead to believe in the first hour. However, the punishment meted out to him in the last fifteen minutes is, well, a little excessive I reckon.

If you're looking to interpret proceedings, Miike is perhaps extolling the virtues of telling the truth, looking after kids in case they grow up as violent killers, and only dating girls whose references check out. However, I found this movie to be too slow at first, then too weird, then too violent. Where Ichi the Killer was fun, in a strange way, this wasn't half as enjoyable.

Recommended for fans of Manga and David Lynch, this won't be suitable for most, and for this reason it does not get a PCMR recommendation. If you're collecting extreme movie experiences, then you might possibly be drawn to watch Audition for sheer curiosity value. However, if you want to get a little more enjoyment from your ultra-extreme movies, I'd suggest you partake in something else, like 'Oldboy', or 'Ichi the Killer'.

Ichi The Killer

The verdict: Two hours of shock and awe. Takashi Miike is pushing the extreme envelope with Ichi the Killer.

The craziness: Torture, arterial spray, sado-masochism, rape and an assortment of other depravities I'm trying to put out of my mind to be honest.

The rating: 6/10

Right... well, where to start with Ichi the Killer, but with the other movies I've seen that come close in terms of extreme shock value? Irreversible remains the most difficult movie I've ever watched, and Oldboy had previously come a close second. The difference between the two was the level of entertainment to be found in Oldboy, which even managed to include one or two darkly comic moments amidst all the mayhem. Irreversible offered no such respite, and that still remains the most affected I have ever been by a movie, in that it made me feel physically ill.

Takashi Miike's movie sits somewhere between the two of these, and is in the same vein of 'extreme' film. It is ultra-violent and horrific, but not completely devoid of a sense of humour, albeit a very very dark one.

Some of the bloody action sequences are just so over the top that they have the comic value of something like Peter Jackson's 'Braindead' or maybe 'The Story of Ricky'. These scenes include the liberal use of aterial spray and severed limbs, and the rather clever device of initially just following the people who 'clean up' after Ichi has done his killing... these scenes show us Ichi's aftermath, organs and entrails make the floor slippery and give us a sense of foreboding about this mysterious assassin.

The story (for what it's worth!) centers around a bunch of in-fighting Yakuza gangs. When the boss of the Anjo gang goes missing, his number 1, a thoroughly despicable torturer named Kakahari - the man in the poster above - sets about trying to find him, using any means necessary.

We are introduced to Kakahari immediately after seeing the after-effects of Ichi's handiwork for the first time, and while we are wondering what kind of ruthless killer Ichi is going to be, we soon learn that Kakahari enjoys pain. Not just inflicting pain, but having pain inflicted on him. His face is horrifically scarred, and we gradually learn that these marks were inflicted by boss Anjo, and that Kakahari has a bizarre attachment to the boss as a result.

While this maniac tortures other mob bosses to find his own, we learn a little more about Ichi himself. This character is truly bizarre, and will defy explanation, but I'll attempt to do him justice as briefly as I can... Right, so he was bullied as a kid, and witnessed a rape, which he actually enjoyed watching. Now grown up, he is being controlled by an enemy of the gangs - a guy named Jijii - who has somehow programmed Ichi to hate and want to kill the Yakuza bullies. When Jijii sends Ichi into a yakuza apartment to take out the bad guys, he dons his black leather superhero costume, replete with blades in the heels of his boots. When his victims inevitably make the mistake of mickey out of his appearance, Ichi burts into tears, but, Incredible Hulk-style, crying triggers his programming, and he literally tears the bad guys to shreds.

The thing is, Ichi is reluctant to inflict violence, while Kakahari revels in it. In fact, Kakahari is addicted to pain, whether it be the giving or receiving. Ichi meanwhile, is in constant trauma about the violence he is inflicting on others, seemingly without any conscious decision on his part. Their separate paths seem on an inevitable collision course, but what will happen when these two incredibly different insane killers meet?

And that's about the size of it... Ichi is thoroughly extreme and not for the faint-hearted. It's nowhere near as good as Oldboy, but marginally more enjoyable than Irreversible, mainly because Ichi's blood-letting is generally way over the top... apart from a few highly questionable scenes involving women. (Women don't generally do to well out of this movie by the way). Kakahari's scenes are far less enjoyable though, given that they involve rather imaginative and nightmarish torture methods. (Including one scene with a scissors that Robert Rodriguez shamelessly lifted for 'Planet Terror')

The following people will almost certainly enjoy 'Ichi the Killer':
1. Asia extreme collectors
2. Horror movie fans
3. Manga fans

If you're not any of those things, you won't like this movie. If, on the other hand, you partake in one of the three activities mentioned above, you'll find a lot in Ichi that you might not have seen before. At the end of the day, it's pretty much a kooky video nasty that kids and students will use to try and gross out their mates after a few pints. High-brow dramatic art it most certainly ain't, unless I missed something when I was watching from between my fingers...